• September 18Forsyth Central vs. Duluth: 41-42

Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump Squabble on Nursery Playground

Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump Squabble on Nursery Playground

Goen Gitter, Staff writer

October 31, 2016


Filed under Punion

The third Presidential Debate took an unexpected turn when Donald Trump (4 years old) and Hillary Clinton (4 years, 3 months, and 3 weeks old) squabbled on a Forsyth County Elementary School playground. Both candidates were initially polite, taking small sips from their Fruit Punch Caprisuns; smiling ...

The Reign of Diet Soda

The Reign of Diet Soda

Filet Minyon and Goen Gitter

October 26, 2016


Filed under Punion

Seventeen-year old Tracey Jamaliouz was walking down the polished, pot-hole filled hallways of Forsyth Central, in the direction of the bathroom, when she was greeted by a strange sight. A vending machine sat in the middle of the hallway, staring her down with it’s neon sign and unplugged chord. She c...

National Geographic Launches an Arctic Expedition Into The Learning Cottages, Hoping to Find Out Why It’s so Dang Cold

National Geographic Launches an Arctic Expedition Into The Learning Cottages, Hoping to Find Out Why It’s so Dang Cold

Josh Hall, Staff Writer

October 18, 2016


Filed under Punion

© EPA On Tuesday morning at 3:03 AM, Temperature-expert James Jamaliouz stood before the National Weather Court (NWC), begging the sleeping panel of judges for funding for his expedition into the learning cottages at Forsyth Central. When asked about his purpose for his expedition, Jamaliouz replied...

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